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I don't advise a haircut, man.
by Withnail and I

I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I

Related topics: Funny

Don't threaten me with a dead fish.
- the movie Withnail & I (1987)

A doctor can bury his mistakes
but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

The physician can bury his mistakes,
but the architect can only advise his client to plant vines -
so they should go as far as possible from home
to build their first buildings.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In every society some men are born to rule,
and some to advise.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Politics is such a torment that I advise everyone
I love not to mix with it.
- Thomas Jefferson

Talent is God-given; be humble.
Fame is man-given; be thankful.
Conceit is self-given; be careful.
- John Wooden

 

Every child comes with the message
that God is not yet discouraged of man.
- Rabindranath Tagore

No man stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child.
- Anonymous (often attributed to Abraham Lincoln)

All things share the same breath -
the beast, the tree, the man...
the air shares its spirit with all the life it supports.
- Chief Seattle (attributed)

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

Adventure is not outside man; it is within.
- George Eliot

Nearly all men can stand adversity,
but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
- Abraham Lincoln

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin

Circumstance does not make the man: it reveals him to himself.
- James Allen

If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

The first question which the priest and the Levite asked was:
"If I stop to help this man, what will happen to me?"
But... the good Samaritan reversed the question:
"If I do not stop to help this man, what will happen to him?"
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

The wise man does not lay up his own treasures.
The more he gives to others, the more he has for his own.
- Lao Tzu

The wise man in the storm prays God,
not for safety from danger,
but for deliverance from fear.
It is the storm within which endangers him,
not the storm without.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The full measure of a man is
not to be found in the man himself,
but in the colors and textures that
come alive in others because of him.
- Albert Schweitzer

We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men
who walked through the huts comforting others,
giving away their last piece of bread...
They offer sufficient proof that everything
can be taken from a man but one thing:
to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances,
to choose one's own way.
- Viktor E. Frankl

Early to bed and early to rise,
makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.
- Benjamin Franklin

As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
- The Bible

Man becomes great exactly in the degree
in which he works for the welfare of his fellow-men.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

To measure the man, measure his heart.
- Malcolm S. Forbes

A man must be both stupid and uncharitable
who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side.
- Joseph Addison

Before you criticize a man,
walk a mile in his shoes.
- Anonymous

Every man and woman is born into the world
to do something unique and something distinctive;
and if he or she does not do it,
it will never be done.
- Benjamin E. Mays

We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks-
if we agree with him.
- Mark Twain

If a man does not know what port he is steering for,
no wind is favorable to him.
- Seneca

The wise man looks into space,
and does not regard the small as too little,
nor the great as too much;
for he knows that there is no limit to dimensions.
- Lao Tzu

The ultimate test of a man's conscience
may be his willingness to sacrifice something today
for future generations whose words of thanks will not be heard.
- Gaylord Nelson

You cannot build character and courage by
taking away a man's initiative and independence.
- Abraham Lincoln

Any man who reads too much
and uses his own brain too little
falls into lazy habits of thinking.
- Albert Einstein

When a man you like switches from what
he said a year ago, or four years ago,
he is a broad-minded person who has courage enough
to change his mind with changing conditions.
When a man you don't like does it,
he is a liar who has broken his promise.
- Franklin Pierce Adams

If a man hasn't discovered something that he will die for,
he isn't fit to live.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Great and good are seldom the same man.
- Winston Churchill

No matter how dull, or how mean, or how wise a man is,
he feels that happiness is his indisputable right.
- Helen Keller

A man who won't die for something is not fit to live.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

A man is ethical only when life, as such, is sacred to him,
that of plants and animals as that of his fellow men,
and when he devotes himself helpfully
to all life that is in need of help.
- Albert Schweitzer

Freedom is never dear at any price.
It is the breath of life.
What would a man not pay for living?
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

A man is but the product of his thoughts -
what he thinks, he becomes.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

The man with insight enough to admit his limitations
comes nearest to perfection.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Try not to become a man of success,
but rather try to become a man of value.
- Albert Einstein

The man of genius inspires us with
a boundless confidence in our own powers.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinions;
it is easy in solitude to live after your own;
but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd
keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

No man is a failure who enjoys life.
- William Feather

Each man is the architect of his own fate.
- Appius Claudius

On life's journey, faith is nourishment,
virtuous deeds are a shelter,
wisdom is the light by day
and right mindfulness is the protection by night.
If a man lives a pure life, nothing can destroy him.
- The Buddha

If you stand up and be counted,
from time to time you may get yourself knocked down.
But remember this: A man flattened by an opponent can get up again.
A man flattened by conformity stays down for good.
- Thomas J. Watson

If thou wilt make a man happy,
add not unto his riches but take away from his desires.
- Epicurus

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance;
the wise grows it under his feet.
- J. Robert Oppenheimer

Life consists in what a man is thinking of all day.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I would rather try to persuade a man to go along,
because once I have persuaded him, he will stick.
If I scare him, he will stay just as long
as he is scared, and then he is gone.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

A wise man will make haste to forgive,
because he knows the true value of time,
and will not suffer it to pass away in unnecessary pain.
- Samuel Johnson

A man who as a physical being
is always turned toward the outside,
thinking that his happiness lies outside him,
finally turns inward and
discovers that the source is within him.
- Soren Kierkegaard

Non-violence requires a double faith,
faith in God and also faith in man.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

No great man ever complains of want of opportunity.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Infinite striving to be the best is man's duty;
it is its own reward.
Everything else is in God's hands.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Many a man curses the rain that falls upon his head,
and knows not that it brings abundance
to drive away the hunger.
- Saint Basil

It is a man's own mind, not his enemy or foe,
that lures him to evil ways.
- The Buddha

Man falls from the pursuit of the ideal
of plain living and high thinking
the moment he wants to multiply his daily wants.
Man's happiness really lies in contentment.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

An honest man is always a child.
- Socrates

A man in debt is so far a slave.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

There is a sufficiency in the world
for man's need but not for man's greed.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

If you talk to a man in a language he understands,
that goes to his head.
If you talk to him in his language,
that goes to his heart.
- Nelson Mandela

The man who has no imagination has no wings.
- Muhammad Ali

The man who can't dance thinks the band is no good.
- Polish Proverb

Science gives man knowledge, which is power;
religion gives man wisdom, which is control.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Of course I am afraid. What sane man is not?
- Luciano Pavarotti


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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